What's Your Story with Jaime & Stan

What's Your Story, Alan Webber? From floundering to finding purpose at 42

Episode Summary

In this revealing and deeply human conversation, Alan Webber shares the extraordinary evolution of his life from bouncing through over 40 jobs in 20 years to finding his true calling as a therapist at the age of 42. A cousin of co-host Stan, Alan’s story is filled with humor, grit, and self-discovery as he opens up about growing up in Boston, navigating career chaos, and ultimately building a life grounded in meaning and mental wellness. If you've ever wondered whether it's "too late" to change direction, this episode proves otherwise.

Episode Notes

In this revealing and deeply human conversation, Alan Webber shares the extraordinary evolution of his life from bouncing through over 40 jobs in 20 years to finding his true calling as a therapist at the age of 42. A cousin of co-host Stan, Alan’s story is filled with humor, grit, and self-discovery as he opens up about growing up in Boston, navigating career chaos, and ultimately building a life grounded in meaning and mental wellness. If you've ever wondered whether it's "too late" to change direction, this episode proves otherwise.

Key topics discussed:

A bumpy road to purpose:

• Alan candidly shares his "20-year flounder phase," cycling through dozens of jobs, from department store manager to pharmaceutical sales.
• He opens up about how therapy (as a client) saved him, and how it led to his transformation into a licensed therapist

REBT and a different way to heal:

• Alan explains Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), a powerful cognitive therapy approach focused on replacing irrational thoughts with rational ones.
• He discusses the importance of personal accountability in emotions: “You generate your own feelings, no one else.”

From burnout to breakthrough:

• At age 40, Alan left a well-paying sales job to go back to school full-time, earning both a bachelor's and master’s degree in just 36 months.
• He and his third wife adopted a child, and Alan reflects on how his childhood trauma shaped his views on fatherhood and what he’d do differently.

Modern mental health meets old-school therapy:

• Why Alan prefers direct, actionable coaching over traditional talk therapy
• The growing mental health crisis among youth and the therapist shortage in today’s world.
   

Marriage, mentorship, and meaning:

• Alan shares the story of meeting his third wife via old-school dating ads complete with a 40-copy mass-mailed letter.
• Now 77, he continues practicing therapy full-time and encourages others to value process over perfection.
   

Memorable quotes:

“You generate your own feelings, no matter what anyone says or does.” – Alan Webber
“Failure isn’t the end. It’s a chance to learn and try again.” – Alan Webber
“It took me 20 years to find myself. And I’d do it all over again.” – Alan Webber

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Where to listen & watch:
🎥 YouTube: https://youtu.be/XZ_39gcHt7Q
🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://tinyurl.com/mtkxjcez
🎧 Spotify: https://tinyurl.com/yhkw24v7
🎧 Amazon Music: https://tinyurl.com/2hnfynpm

Connect with Alan:
Website: https://www.psychologytoday.com/profile/820525

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